Here is a collection of funny quips, funny bad jokes and images for easy entertainment brought together to give you a laugh and to save you time looking for them.
I went on a once-in-a-lifetime vacation. Never again.
What did the duck say when she bought a lipstick? Put it on my bill!
Where did the computer go dancing? The disc-o!
What do bees do if they need a ride? Wait at the buzz stop!
What do you give to a sick lemon? Lemon aid!
What do you call a monkey that loves Doritos? A chipmunk!
Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’ve bagels!
What do you call a farm that makes bad jokes? Corny!
What kind of dogs love car racing? Lap dogs!
What did Winnie the Pooh say to his agent? “Show me the honey!”
My favourite word is “drool.” It just rolls off the tongue.
I wasn’t going to visit my family this December, but my mom promised to make me Eggs Benedict. So I’m going home for the hollandaise.
What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? “Oh sheet!”
Why do cow-milking stools only have three legs? Because the cow’s got the udder!
How many bugs do you need to rent out an apartment? Tenants.
What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.
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